


Touch Starved

by penguinkool



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: I'm so touch starved help me, Knife Mention, this is a vent fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-29
Updated: 2019-06-29
Packaged: 2020-05-29 15:42:53
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 586
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19403374
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/penguinkool/pseuds/penguinkool
Summary: Patton is touch starved someone help him





	Touch Starved

When Patton woke up, the first thing he noticed was the dull ache in his chest. He knew straight away what it meant. Sometimes he hated being the literal embodiment of feelings. Sometimes, they seemed to eat him up inside and all he would want to do was curl up in a ball, with his teddy close to his chest. And somedays all he wanted was a hug.

He hated those days, because he knew that it wouldn’t go away until he got one so he’d have to deal with it all day. Because chances are, no one else felt the same way. He normally could repress this feeling, pretend it wasn’t there but today was not one of those days, it seemed. If anyone was to so much as touch him today, he knew that he might combust due to how brief and fleeting it would be. A simple touch on the shoulder would physically cause the weight in his chest to turn into an anvil. Because it wouldn’t be enough.

He felt like crying. It was the worse feeling in the world and it caused him so much internal conflict because on one hand, he could just ask someone for the comfort; but on the other, it would hurt all the more when they said no or with how brief it would be (which would just make him crave the contact even more, cause the sinking, needy feeling in his chest to tighten).

He tightened his hold on the teddy, pulling it flush against his chest, hoping it would relieve some of the overwhelming need to be held by someone. Hoping that the warmth of the teddy would be enough to satisfy him. He found that it wasn’t. On other days, it would be enough but it seemed that today was not one of those days.

He thought about the others. Roman would be the most likely to oblige in the physical contact that he so craved. He’d swing him in his arms, and hold him gently against his chest as Patton giggled. But Roman was currently on an adventure in the mind palace and wouldn’t be back for a few days. Virgil often shied away from physical contact and would only engage in it sometimes, so he was out of the question. And then there was Logan.. He never seemed to engage in any sort of physical contact if it was possible, so he knew that there was no way that he could ask him to help out his conundrum. 

He hated this. Why did the feeling of physical contact have to mean so much to him, so much as to make him feel so heavy. The anvil in his chest tightened. It almost felt like it was turning into a knife, the point jabbing into him and making itself unable to be ignored, no matter how hard he tried. His skin tingled with the need of physical touch. It was overwhelming.. It was so exhausting. He wasn’t sure how long he could deal with this feeling today.

He knew that he’d have to get up soon. He’d have to make breakfast for his kiddos whilst ignoring the crushing need to be held, but he’d bare it, no matter how hard it was. But for now, he buried himself under his blankets, and clutched his teddy bear tighter, hoping but knowing that it would never be enough.

But maybe if he had asked, he would have found that the others felt the same.


End file.
